For a couple of months now I have been hearing Barack Obama refer to George W. Bush's diplomacy as "cowboy diplomacy". You know the kind of diplomacy that pisses the Democrats off not to mention Saddam Hussein.

Even Hillary made reference to the same kind of thing. I think they were referring to the Iraq war and how it is that cowboys have a habit of seeking out dictators who defy the World and and those who use their WMDs on women and children... and their husbands and then go find that son-of-a-birch  and... well hang him.Yeah... they are Cowboys.

I have been so busy with living that I don't remember if this kind of diplomacy has been happening a lot. I remember hearing that Mussolini got noosed... but aside from Saddam Hussein I can't remember anybody else that George W. Bush has actually seen strung up (well foreigners I mean). As I recall it wasn't any one in the Bush family that noosed Mussolini. It was his own people. Red-neck Italians. The best.

Maybe my readers can tell me.

What? I have no readers? Well that is beside the point and seems a little bit like a cheap smear. I might need my second grade teacher to help me out here but then... she died and since then I have learned to defend myself... and "do good on your tests, Mikie". This by the way was before she had anything to gain by Mikie "doing good" on his tests.

So Barack Obama's characterization of George W. Bush's efforts at diplomacy has gotten me to thinking about what Obama's efforts at diplomacy would be.

At first I didn't see a darn thing. It was invisible... what Obama would do. Obama has criticized Bush's diplomacy as being "cowboy diplomacy". Hillary kind of agreed with him. But Obama doesn't seem to want her for Vice President so the Change he is advocating must be something he alone has devised.

Yeah. That could be it. Change you can Believe in Once he figures it out. Yeah. That must be it.

But then Russia... well not Russia... but rather Putin decided Russia needs to have a Georgia, too. But rather than woo the Georgia he chose with his own "Change you Can Believe In" message, Putin went in there with his old Russian tanks and took her... I mean it... well the whole damn country. Nice guy.

And it was probably not the Russian Vodka. I have tried that stuff myself and I never thought I could take over Georgia with my tanks on that stuff. No... the Vodka made me think I could take her over with my wit.

It didn't work... the Vodka I mean. Georgia said it was nice to know me... and then she married Jerry.

So then I saw where Barack Obama said let the UN figure it out... negotiate a deal. But later he thought better of that stupid idea and decided to do some diplomacy of his own.

"Hi. I'm the Candidate for Change in America... and I'd like to introduce you to the Change I want  er.. us to make. We used to use "cowboy diplomacy" here... uhh... when George W. Bush was President... uhh... but me and my pards... uuhh... friends... we decided we  could  uuhh... change that.

"Uhh... Howdie Doody Mr Putin. You have as much right to your position in this matter as I have to my position."

What's your position, Howdie?

"Uhhh... well, it appears that I am sitting on someone's...  uuhh... lap and they seem to be doing some of the talking for me... but... ahh... that is just the result of The... Uhhh... Change I uhh.. proposed. I would er.. uh.. speak for myself if I could get a word in uh... edgewise."

Well who is speaking for you? And I don't care whose lap your sitting on... we don't have that sort of open discussion in Russia. We outlawed that kind of thing mainly to protect our previous leaders. But go on.

"The American People are speaking for me... and uuuhh...  for me. They plan to speak up... uhh... in the uhhh...pcoming election and they will choose me to be their... uhh, well I was going to say uhh... leader... but that goddamn cowboy said "dummie". Don't listen to... uuuh.. him."

So what do you think about us taking Georgia?

"Oh that's okay. I never...  uuuhhh... expect to win there anyway... too many uuuhh... cowboys... not to mention friking rednecks.

"But Mr Putin... er... ahhh... uhh... before I go would you... uuuhhh... consider being a little bit nicer to the.... uuhh.... neighbors? I mean it would... uuuh... help me... uuuhhh... out?"

Sure, if it will get you elected. Tell the American People we DON'T want Virginia. Tell them we DON'T want Arkansas, either. And we sure as hell DON'T WANT TEXAS... not here in Russia. Those goddamn cowboys would be all over us trying to get their "gals" back. We don't need that kind of diplomacy here.

"Thanks for your support... uhh....  Mr Putin. I knew we could work this out.

"Hey, I just saved America!"

Yeah... Howdie Doody you tried. And you tried it with your... uuhh... Howdie Doody diplomacy.

I'd rather have a cowboy.

Mikie